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Things No One Else Seems To Understand

Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will.
Jan 21 '13
private-revolution:

madamethursday:


[Image: A picture of a tall, very thin Black woman with her shoulder over a shorter, older white man wearing traditional Orthodox Jewish clothing on a New York sideway.]
staghunts:


“This one is very serious, guys:
I came upon these two on the sidewalk. They were having a conversation. “Excuse me,” I said, addressing the girl: “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is there anyway I can take your photo?”
“Why would you want my photo?” she asked.
“Because you look beautiful,” I said. And she did. She was Sudanese. There is a very distinct beauty among people from the Sudan, and she was filled up with it. Suddenly the man cut in: 
“I was just telling her she was beautiful,” he said. 
Naively, I assumed I had just walked up on one stranger giving a compliment to another. I wanted to capture the moment. “Let me take your photograph together,” I said. The man seemed reluctant, he started smiling nervously and inching away. But the girl called him back. 
“Come take a picture with me,” she said. Encouraged by her attention, he returned. She put her arm around him, and I took the photo.
As I examined the photos on my camera, the man started whispering to the girl. She answered him in a loud voice: “I told you! I’m not that kind of girl.” She seemed agitated now. Finally sensing that I had misread the situation, I stepped between them. The man began hurrying down the sidewalk.
When the man left, the girl’s demeanor changed completely. She seemed shaken. Her eyes were tearing up. “He just offered me five hundred dollars to go out with him,” she said. “And then when I said ‘no,’ he offered me one thousand. Why does this always happen to me?”
“It happens a lot?” I asked.
“All the time,” she said. “I’m sorry I’m getting emotional. I just can’t go out of my house without this kind of thing happening. I have a son. I’m a mother. I would never degrade myself like that. I just don’t understand why this keeps happening.”
“Do you mind if I tell this story?” I asked.
“Please,” she said. “Tell it.”
Let’s hope this man, and all men, realize the emotional damage they are inflicting on the women they try to buy. In the meantime, feel free to SHARE.*
Dear Tumblr, fuck you for trying to erase this. 


I’m saving this post because as many times as Tumblr tries to erase this woman’s story and act like anything about this was okay, that’s as many times as I’m reposting it. They can either cut me off or stop being assnuggets about this. whichEVER. 



Bringing this back because we’re 20 days into 2013 and I have yet to see this post.

private-revolution:

madamethursday:

[Image: A picture of a tall, very thin Black woman with her shoulder over a shorter, older white man wearing traditional Orthodox Jewish clothing on a New York sideway.]

staghunts:

“This one is very serious, guys:

I came upon these two on the sidewalk. They were having a conversation. “Excuse me,” I said, addressing the girl: “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is there anyway I can take your photo?”

“Why would you want my photo?” she asked.

“Because you look beautiful,” I said. And she did. She was Sudanese. There is a very distinct beauty among people from the Sudan, and she was filled up with it. Suddenly the man cut in: 

“I was just telling her she was beautiful,” he said. 

Naively, I assumed I had just walked up on one stranger giving a compliment to another. I wanted to capture the moment. “Let me take your photograph together,” I said. The man seemed reluctant, he started smiling nervously and inching away. But the girl called him back. 

“Come take a picture with me,” she said. Encouraged by her attention, he returned. She put her arm around him, and I took the photo.

As I examined the photos on my camera, the man started whispering to the girl. She answered him in a loud voice: “I told you! I’m not that kind of girl.” She seemed agitated now. Finally sensing that I had misread the situation, I stepped between them. The man began hurrying down the sidewalk.

When the man left, the girl’s demeanor changed completely. She seemed shaken. Her eyes were tearing up. “He just offered me five hundred dollars to go out with him,” she said. “And then when I said ‘no,’ he offered me one thousand. Why does this always happen to me?”

“It happens a lot?” I asked.

“All the time,” she said. “I’m sorry I’m getting emotional. I just can’t go out of my house without this kind of thing happening. I have a son. I’m a mother. I would never degrade myself like that. I just don’t understand why this keeps happening.”

“Do you mind if I tell this story?” I asked.

“Please,” she said. “Tell it.”

Let’s hope this man, and all men, realize the emotional damage they are inflicting on the women they try to buy. In the meantime, feel free to SHARE.*

Dear Tumblr, fuck you for trying to erase this. 

I’m saving this post because as many times as Tumblr tries to erase this woman’s story and act like anything about this was okay, that’s as many times as I’m reposting it. They can either cut me off or stop being assnuggets about this. whichEVER. 

Bringing this back because we’re 20 days into 2013 and I have yet to see this post.

Jan 17 '13
"‎”Boys are told from a young age that whatever they do will be excused under the “boys will be boys” mantra, and that “boys will be boys” mentality leads to what I call the “BOILING FROG” problem of women’s sexual boundaries. I call it that because if you put a frog into a pot of boiling water, it will jump right out, but if you put a frog into a pot of room-temperature water and slowly heat it to a boil, the frog will acclimate as it heats and never jump out, eventually boiling to death. Similarly, when we learn as young girls to tolerate “low-level” boundary violations like the ones we often are forced to suffer in silence at school, at home and on the street – bra-snapping, boob-grabbing, ass pinching, catcalling, dick flashing “all in good fun” relentless violations that adults and authorities routinely ignore – it makes it harder for us to notice when even greater boundaries are being violated, eventually leading to the reality that many women who are raped just freeze and fall silent, because that’s what they’ve been taught to do over and over since day one. You tell me what’s more infantilizing: repeatedly letting boys (and grown men) off the hook for their behavior because “boys will be boys” and we can’t ever expect any differently, or creating a consent standard in which all partners take active responsibility for their partner’s safety, and which acknowledges the truly diseased sexual culture we’re soaking in every day.”"
Jan 16 '13
Jan 16 '13

padagasms:

onewhositswiththeturtles:

f-airytaless:

this picture should have more then the amounts of notes it has, this shows us that not ever thing is “picture perfect” and that behind that smile and those eyes there is fear . So i beg you to please reblog this instead of a pair of shoes, someone smoking a blunt, and clothes … because this picture is literally worth 1,000 words 

This is insanely powerful.

lizywkim:

wow, please reblog this.

Oh Lord, the amount of power in this picture

When I scrolled down and saw the second picture I felt my stomach actually drop.

*tearing up*

Literally gasped when I saw the second picture. This NEEDS more exposure.

(Source: awayfromearth)

Jan 13 '13
"Another myth that is firmly upheld is that disabled people are dependent and non-disabled people are independent. No one is actually independent. This is a myth perpetuated by disablism and driven by capitalism - we are all actually interdependent. Chances are, disabled or not, you don’t grow all of your food. Chances are, you didn’t build the car, bike, wheelchair, subway, shoes, or bus that transports you. Chances are you didn’t construct your home. Chances are you didn’t sew your clothing (or make the fabric and thread used to sew it). The difference between the needs that many disabled people have and the needs of people who are not labelled as disabled is that non-disabled people have had their dependencies normalized. The world has been built to accommodate certain needs and call the people who need those things independent, while other needs are considered exceptional. Each of us relies on others every day. We all rely on one another for support, resources, and to meet our needs. We are all interdependent. This interdependence is not weakness; rather, it is a part of our humanity."
AJ Withers Disability Politics and Theory p109  (via peachgrl)

(Source: dandyfied)

Jan 3 '13
"They presented male employers with identical job applicants—same experience, same qualifications, same resume—except one was named Dave and the other Diane. Then men in traditional marriages rated “Diane” significantly lower than Dave. Because, you know, vagina. Every woman has felt that—that moment when you can see a man’s engagement switch off, and realize that he will never take you as seriously as he would if you came back with a chest-merkin and a handlebar mustache. But it’s an almost impossible feeling to quantify, and an even harder one to communicate to people who have never felt it. An argument that can be vaporized with an emphatic enough “nu uh!” is a difficult argument to win."

That Condescending Feeling You Get From Dudes in the Office? Yeah, That’s Real. (via notemily)

Sums up my feelings just about every day after class this month, thanks to one single guy in there.

(via lostgrrrls)

Even in my female-dominated profession (counseling), the thoughts and opinions of male psychiatrists and peers are given more credence. And the dismissiveness with which those men treat our thoughts and opinions is palpable.  So yeah.

(via goddessdster)

20 years ago, 60 Minutes did a segment on the effect of race in the hiring process. They took the same resumes and put “ethnic” names on one set and “traditional” white names on the second set. In 8/10 instances, employers chose the candidate with the white sounding name. They did the same experiment about 5 years ago just before the 2008 recession hit and had similar results even against names like “Willow” and “Rainbow” - previously frowned upon as “Hippy” names.
And this is why both my girls have gender neutral (read: male) and race neutral (read: white) names.

(via generalbriefing)

Dec 31 '12
"I pushed a Muslim off the train tracks because I hate Hindus and Muslims ever since 2001 when they put down the twin towers, I’ve been beating them up."

Erika Menendez, a 31-year-old woman who was arrested on Saturday and charged with second-degree murder as a hate crime in connection with the death of a man who was pushed onto the tracks of an elevated subway station in Queens and crushed by an oncoming train on Thursday. 

The victim, 46-year-old Sunando Sen, was born in India & raised Hindu. If convicted, Menendez could face the maximum penalty of life in prison. 

(via thepeoplesrecord)

this is foul and disgusting. 

Dec 31 '12

TW: self-harm, suicide, rape, assault, abuse

  • self harm: is not an attention seeking phase. it is an addiction.
  • eating disorders: are not a fashion statement. They are addictions and disorders that slowly kill the individual struggling with it.
  • suicide: is not the cowards way out. it becomes the last option only when someone feels that there is nothing left. but thats not true, there is always something new to try. keep trying new things until you find the one thing that distracts your thoughts.
  • depression: is not just feeling sad one day. it is debilitating. you feel like the world is crushing you down and even getting out of bed takes so much energy, it becomes a miracle when you get dressed in the morning.
  • anxiety: is not being rude to people around you. some people just dont like being touched or around crowds, please respect that.
  • bipolar: isnt just mood swings.
  • mpd/did: isnt made up. it is caused by severe trauma. usually childhood sexual abuse.
  • abuse: it is never ever your fault. please tell someone before it gets worse, so that the person hurting you doesnt hurt someone else.
  • rape: clothes a person wear dont cause rape. rape isnt exclusively male on female, males can rape males, females can rape females, and females can rape males. never blame the victim.
  • if you or someone you knows struggles with any of these things, please know that i am here for you. i want to help you as much as i can. i want you to know that you arent alone, other people understand. my ask is always open, feel free to leave me a message if you ever need to talk.
  • stay strong and hold on. life gets better.
Dec 30 '12
"All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair."
Mitch Albom, The Five People You Meet in Heaven (via larmoyante)
Dec 28 '12